Go for it‏

I've been thinking for a while about what I should really say. There are so many things I want to accomplish and there are so many things that seem to stand in the way. Well its time that I stop allowing things to stop me from accomplishing what I want to do. Too many people let little things stop them from doing the big things they want to accomplish or do. When thinking of this I think of the movie the bucket list. A man on his death bed makes a list of all the things he wants to do before he dies. Why do we have to wait until we are dying before we try to get all that stuff done. That is why so many things that I have mentioned on this blog are so important.

When my daughter was born I fell in love with that little girl, it facinated me that I was a father, and she didn't have to do anything to earn my love. This is a beutiful statement, but the matter of the fact is that I started putting off things after she was born. She wasn't in the way, she didn't stop me, I just didn't do them. Yes there is a thing called priorities, the problem that I had was that I never made myself a priority, I wanted to make everyone else happy and quietly on the inside I started resenting everyone that was in the way. It wasn't anyone but myself who was really in the way.

How often do we get in the way of ourselves. What makes it worse is that we blame it on other people. My ex-wife really took a beating on this subject. I spent too much time saying no to things that I wanted to do when in reality I needed to just talk with her about these things. I'm not saying over do it and spite everything else, I am saying just don't let it stop you from at least trying. For years I have said that I wanted to study a new martial art. I wouldn't do it because I was always making excuses of why I couldn't, I was too fat, I was too old, I was too busy. These statements were just excuses to my reality. To say that my ex-wife didn't want me to do it may have been true, but I never talked to her about it, she may have loved me doing it, the excersize that I would have gotten and the health benefits would have done wonders for my body and my self esteem, just like it is doing for me now.

Another example of just going for it that I have seen in my life is when a guy is interested in a girl or vice versa. Many times nothing happens between the two people, but not because there isn't any chemistry, but because there isn't even a chance for chemistry to happen. How are you supposed to find your perfect match if you don't try. Many people are afraid of rejection, but the reality is that you won't always be rejected. I know it hurts to ask a girl out for dinner and she says no, it like she says to you, that she finds you so vile she won't even have a free meal with you, I know thats messed up. But I do know that I never took a girl out without approaching her and at least saying hi.

But that is so common across the board that it is painful. So many people give up because they are afraid of rejection. Rejection is something that happens to even the best of us. But it is part of life. There are some levels of rejection that are tougher than others, divorce is a big pill to swallow, when you are going through a divorce often times you feel like the person who promised never to turn their back on you, to be by your side for the remainder of your lives, is giving you the ultimate form of rejection. I know this feeling, but I don't live with this feeling. I believe that marriage is a very serious commitment, something that no one should ever take lightly, but the reality is you never know the circumstances that cause a divorce until you go through it yourself. The reality is that it doesn't matter how much game you have or if you are good looking, or have a lot of money, the thing that really matters is that you are just being you.

Being you is very hard if you aren't trying to do the things for yourself that you need to do. You can't love yourself, or appreciate life if you don't do these things. It even makes it hard to find out what you want if you don't go after it. You will never know what you are good at or what you love if you never do it. How often times I have met people who sit there and say I wish I had done this or that and carry the regret their whole life because they weren't willing to try. Live life because we only get one shot at it,

It reminds me of a poem I once read on a sign, about how the man never drank, never smoked, and he really didn't do anything, and when he died his insurance wouldn't pay because he never really lived. If you want to have a great life then you have to live, just sitting on the couch and living through the screen in front of you isn't really living. Do something with yourself, don't wait on everything else to fall into place make it happen. One of my favorite movie quotes is spoken by Andy Dufresne (played by Tim Robbins) in The Shawshank Redemption is "Get busy living, or get busy dying".